Tuesday, March 8, 2011


I am doing less than well today. And this week. And more or less this month. Honestly, this year has been pretty crap. I spend a lot of my time feeling like I'm just treading water, but lately it feels like the water is above my head. I'm exhausted most of the time. I either don't sleep, or sleep and wake up feeling as though I haven't. I'm currently fighting an invisible foe- I think we either have fleas or bed bugs. Not sure which, but I'm treating it as though it's bed bugs just in case. I have over a dozen big, itchy welts. Vacuuming, spraying, slip-covering, washing, cleaning, and starting all over again to try and get whatever is biting me in check. I've got several tests over the next few weeks. I am not sure what my next step is with math, confused as to what is needed for my major. Realizing I have to take a foreign language. I need the intermediate credits, which means I get to spend $300 and two semesters taking the basics just to get to the intermediates. And I can't possibly keep my grades where I feel I need them to be with all of this. Josh's day job is tenuous at best, and his evening job has been bringing in a lot less money for the last year. My job is still around, and I still don't like it. The house still needs foundation repairs, which I haven't had time to schedule. I'm blushing uncontrollably now, sometimes just if I think about blushing. My leg cramps have returned.

I'll get by. But I'm definitely considering living in a van by the river right now.


MrsEm said...

Hang in there, sweet girl. I'm sure it will all work out. When I'm stressed like that it can help to volunteer for a couple hours. Keeps things in perspective.

Unknown said...

Apply for FAFSA immediately, you are definitely eligible for pell grants and such. I didn't pay for a dime of school on my own. You are probably also eligible for all kinds of scholarships, you can find it under financial aid on your schools website. Hang in there, I fight depression on a regular basis and have only recently found something that works. Normal antidepressants have never worked for me, they work opposite, making me more depressed, but I just got put on one and they added Abilify...my God the difference, I feel so much better. Find out about it.